Three seasons in one week and planning a girls weekend!

We've had temps ranging from the high 30's to the low 80's. We were able to get a five hour bike ride in last Sunday. It was a full leather with chaps day, but it was still good.

I have a nice girl’s weekend planned for June 7-9 with my niece half way between us. Well...almost half way. My drive will be 3-1/2 hours and hers will be 2-1/2 hours. I planned it that way because I found a really nice area we can hike out to some waterfalls and drive around the area checking out a bunch of covered bridges and scenic drives. I know it sounds boring to some, but it's not so much what we do, it's spending time together doing something we can both enjoy. She is not a biker or in any way a drinker...not that I'm a party animal. She will probably insist on finding a nearby church, which will be fine with me. It's been too long for me anyway.

The following story will give you an idea how close we are, plus I sometimes need to get things out. There are allot of things I don't talk to many people about. Here I can say anything and it's pretty close to being anonymous. Only one person knows I have this blog and that's my best friend of all time, who is the only person I can tell everything. I love you Gina!

This is my late sister's daughter; we spent a great deal of our younger years together. She was only nine years younger, but I spent most of my summers babysitting her and her brother at my sister’s apartment while my sister worked as a bartender. During the school year, my mom took care of them. When I started taking care of them, she was about three and her brother was about one. He was still in diapers. That would have made me about 12. Since my sister worked late evenings, I got my niece and nephew breakfast and took care of them while my sister slept in. Then when my sister went to work, I took care of dinner and the kids till about 2-3 am or whenever she dragged herself in. I lived with them about three of my summers doing this. It helped both of us along with my mother, who was raising me and my brother on SS. My mother was unable to work because of an old injury to her back and at that time there was no such thing as disability or welfare or if there was, she wouldn’t take it. The most she got was holiday dinners at Salvation Army. She was also taking care of my bed ridden grandmother who was senile with dementia. My sister gave me a small allowance, "pay" and bought my school cloths, giving her the freedom of having a live-in sitter.

My sister ended up marrying a bouncer at the club she was a bartending at and she had a little girl from that marriage. I watched all three kids for a short while till they moved back to his home town in MO. I never did like him, he gave me a bad feeling that I couldn't explain. Things get a little hard to remember the exact order things happened once they moved to MO. I spent a couple of weeks of each of my summer vacations there. We did allot of traveling back and forth which makes it hard to remember what order things happened. As best as I can figure, the following is how it all came together.

From the time my niece was about 8 till she was 12, her step father molested her. He told her he would kill her and her brother if she ever told. Being a child and a victim, she believed him. My sister eventually found out, left him, brought charges against him, and came to stay with us till it went to court. She then got "advice" from a minister. He told her she needed to learn to forgive her husband. (I would have forgiven him only after he was dead and in the ground, and I have my doubts about forgiving him even then). My sister ended up going back to him taking her son and youngest daughter (his daughter) and left my niece with me and my ex for the remainder of the school year. This was to give my sister and her husband time to get counseling so he could overcome his "demons". I can only imagine how betrayed my niece felt because of her mother going back to him. (A thought I never mentioned to my niece). Somehow the charges were dropped, I think at that time it was up to the parents whether charges were brought and my understanding was that she didn't want to put my niece through a trial. My niece would talk to me a little about it but not much and I never pressured her to talk about it. I have to give my ex credit, he was really good about it and was real good to her.

My sister came to get her at the end of the school year. Tensions were high and things got complicated. From what I understand, accusations were made by her husband that it was all my nieces fault for seducing him...she was only about 8 when it all began! I completely believe her for two reasons. One her age, she could not make those things up, and because a few years earlier while I was there on one of my summer vacations, he touched my breast with his finger as if he was pointing to something on my top while asking what was on my shirt. I was about 13 or 14. I gave him a dirty look and pulled away. I never talked about it because I didn't know what to make of it and it embarrassed me. He must have thought I would be too much of a challenge because he never tried anything again. I sometimes thought later that if I had said something then, maybe my niece would not have suffered for so long, but at the time it never occurred to me that she was in any danger.

After things didn't work out as a family unit, my understanding is that my sister left my niece with a neighbor saying she would be back in a couple hours, taking her youngest two with her and came back here and stayed with us. When we asked about my niece, she said she was staying with her best friend across the street till she could get settled. After causing all kinds of drama here, she headed back to MO again, or so we thought. Somehow the two oldest kids ended up in foster care. Our family didn't know what had happened to them. Next thing we knew my sister was living in TX with just her youngest daughter and had been remarried. I only saw her one time after that and that was at my mother’s funeral. She went back to TX, the next time we heard from her was a short time later when she called my brother at work asking for money to leave her new husband. He told her he didn't have any to spare and she never contacted any of us again.

My niece's real father was in prison while all this was going on. When he got out, he found them through the courts and he was told that if he was able to put together a life for them he would be given custody after his parole was up. He got remarried and when he got custody he brought the kids up from MO for a visit and moved to IN. He never kept in touch after that. His wife left him a while later and my niece pretty much ran the house after his wife left. He was a hard man, but he loved them and tried his best.

When my niece was older and married, she started checking the internet and found her mother in TX and they reunited. My niece and her husband moved my sister along with her younger half-sister from her stepfather, and her sister's two kids into their home until my sister could get a place.

My sister died about six years ago and my niece started looking for us through the internet. She finally found us about five years ago. My youngest niece told her she should just forget us because of the way their mother felt about us. I guess when my brother didn't help her and she knew she couldn't ask me again, she decided we were no good to her.

My niece said that one of her foster parents got her back into church and it was her faith that got her through it and helped her forgive her mother. She has a very strong faith in God and I admire her for it.

Now we're just as close as ever. Sometimes I'll be at work and I'll get a text from her that says, "Just wanted to say I love you and I'm so blessed to have you in my life" or "Thinking about you. Love you soooo much" or sometimes just one word..."Lovins!"

She sent me a private message on FB last night, "I'm getting so excited about our weekend" I'm looking forward to it too. I know it will be a good weekend together and it will be filled with long talks, tears, hugs, and laughter...or as my niece would sum it all up…“Lovins!”.